Forever wandering the hallways' Journal

5:28am: Not in a full state of existence

My time for re-emergence is late
Denied the fullness of evidence

Longing to be released
A frontal presentation, not a background dimness

Former incalescentce on the glacier numbness
Memeories fade in sepia

Desolation, my consort

7:26am: Unannounced
Unplanned
Unexpected

Awake, risen from summer hibernation
Disturbingly disrupted from slumber

Unnatural
Unseemly
Uneasy

Blurry, Icy-ness settling in
Adhearing to flesh
Melding to bones
Entwining to veins

Veil in place
Mantle reworn
Aspect assumed

Oblique again

7:08am: One cannot be jealous of the dead
Scattered, tattered remnants
Receive adoration
Ashes of affection

A revered, reviled shell
A evacuated husk
Chilled, silent

By-passed, ignored in shrouded haziness
Deadend, not dead
A non-existing numbness
Suffocating indifference

Too alive for you

3:35am: felodese

Do not leave me just yet. It would be unbearable.

3:44am: Spring is not a season I belong

Diminishment of cold, darkness
Shrouded in dusk, lurking in the corner of a eye

Your intriguing haze of words swirl
Infuse
Inject
Entwine
this form in comforting incandescence

Wander the broken hallways
Solitary corridors
Only this consort abates loneliness

Patience awaits in the rough doorway
dissipates uneasiness
A welcoming velvet convoy

2:33am: Disappointment is bitter nourishment.

A saline flavoured obstruction
Amaroidal hinderence, choking, clogging the throat

Moldering particles sinking, separating in corrosiveness
Regret sinously slithering through torsional veins

1:01am: Eternally plagued by past situations. Unchanging, unsolved/unresolved.

Daily life is dirtily mundane.

Fear melded with disappointment.

2:22am: Respite from my hiatus.

Explanations.....

One aspect of three. Lurking beneath the surface. Hiding around the edges. A patient, persistent aura. Rarely assumed mantle.

A fascinating enigma, conundrum, a riddle to be solved.

In this aspect of obliqueone, answers are evasive.

Outside of the hallways, the reality disappoints, depresses. An intriguing deception. Unknown to many.

Comfort of past panaceas, forever lost. Longing, desiring tranquil nepenthe. Trickles of lethe, mainlined.

Veils worn voluntarily. Mourning, an unromantic activity. Reluctantly, lovingly performed.

Surreal, delusional situations. Lost in the vast, invisible until the next incarnation.

Spring may thaw the frozen bitterness. Wallowing, floating in the numbness. Evaporations shall not come.

2:36am: Situations are unwell.

A temporary hiatus is needed.

mathyula, your words are always floating in my mind. They are appreciated.

Explanations & replies shall be provided at a later date.

Bleakness & numbness embrace me.

4:09am: I offer thanks to those who complimented my work. Time outside the hallways is illusionary/hallucinatory.

The chilly depression shall be immolated. This cracked, rusted vessel will be warmed.

Gray ashes flicker and fall. Smudge, darkly upon my veil. Stain & soot, trailing along the grainy floors.

Longing for the null & void of indifference.

4:17am: Drowned like Ophelia.

2:02pm: The Sensualist

"Ah, resentment!" Helen half smiled to herself. Resentment held her hand, resentment stroked her hair, resentment, shared her bed." pg 18.

"We're all experts on anatomy, you know--you only need to have one broken heart to be an expert on anatomy." Rosa, pg 10

12:30am: Stark


Cold


Lonely

10:14am: Insomnia

Unsleeping

I restlessly walk the hallways. Hypnos and Morpheus allude me. Cruel, jingling laughter wafts around my weary veiled form.

2:55am: "Double negative, he thought, relieved to have retained contact with a real world of grammatical propriety. Double negative: two empty mirrors reflecting each other's emptiness to infinite powers, nothing canceling out nothing.

"Conversations in a Dead Language"-Thomas Ligotti

7:21pm: Abortion

5:03pm: "The mirror is dangerous; it sometimes shows her the dark manifestation of air that matches her body, takes her form, but stands behind, watching her, with porcine eyes and wet, hushed breathing."

From "The Hours" by Micheal Cunningham

3:26am: It is not often that I take a quiz.

I Am

Which tarot card are you?

I was mildly surprised not to receive the Hermit.

1:16am: In the hallways I walk, the air is brittle and shatteringly cold. Placidly it hangs, waiting to stir. My numb limbs are smooth, white marble, not penetrated by the crystal cool temperature. On occasion, I shed the heavy black shrouds for red airy veils. The bright colour, offers internal warmth.

The facade is fixed in place. My features are distorted, blurry to curious eyes.

4:23am: Reality



Are we in the same reality?
What I perceive is not always what you percive

Which view is right?
Possibly all views are correct in thier own way.

2:20am: Hermit



The Hermit signifies a time to withdrawl from extroverted activities. Patiently contemplate, achieve wisdom.

7:01pm: Facade

Death

Tarot




I am very respectful of the Tarot.

To receive the card of "Death" means a change is approaching.

4:22pm: Asocial

My tolerance for the the company of others is low. Social intercourse is banal and inane. Do not waste my time with the trivialities of your witless life.

The thoughts and visions in my brain are my companions.

12:01am: A Shroud




The visage that lurks behind the cloth
Hides from the hateful prying of others
It Shall not be revealed

5:35pm: love ( P ) Pronunciation Key (luv)
n.

1.A deep, tender, ineffable feeling of affection and solicitude toward a person, such as that arising from kinship, recognition of attractive qualities, or a sense of underlying oneness.

2.A feeling of intense desire and attraction toward a person with whom one is disposed to make a pair; the emotion of sex and romance.

a.Sexual passion.
b.Sexual intercourse.
c.A love affair.
d.An intense emotional attachment, as for a pet or treasured object.

3.A person who is the object of deep or intense affection or attraction; beloved. Often used as a term of endearment.
4.An expression of one's affection: Send him my love.

5.A strong predilection or enthusiasm: a love of language.
The object of such an enthusiasm: The outdoors is her greatest love.
6.Love Mythology. Eros or Cupid.
7.often Love Christianity. Charity.
8.Sports. A zero score in tennis.

v. loved, lov·ing, loves
v. tr.
1.To have a deep, tender, ineffable feeling of affection and solicitude toward (a person): We love our parents. I love my friends.
2.To have a feeling of intense desire and attraction toward (a person).
3.To have an intense emotional attachment to: loves his house.

a.To embrace or caress.
b.To have sexual intercourse with.
c.To like or desire enthusiastically: loves swimming.
d.Theology. To have charity for.
e.To thrive on; need: The cactus loves hot, dry air.

v. intr.
To experience deep affection or intense desire for another.

Idioms:
for love
Out of compassion; with no thought for a reward: She volunteers at the hospital for love.
for love or money
Under any circumstances. Usually used in negative sentences: I would not do that for love or money.
for the love of
For the sake of; in consideration for: did it all for the love of praise.
in love
Deeply or passionately enamored: a young couple in love.
Highly or immoderately fond: in love with Japanese painting; in love with the sound of her own voice.
no love lost
No affection; animosity: There's no love lost between them.


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[Middle English, from Old English lufu. See leubh- in Indo-European Roots.]
Synonyms: love, affection, devotion, fondness, infatuation
These nouns denote feelings of warm personal attachment or strong attraction to another person. Love is the most intense: marrying for love. Affection is a less ardent and more unvarying feeling of tender regard: parental affection. Devotion is earnest, affectionate dedication and implies selflessness: teachers admired for their devotion to children. Fondness is strong liking or affection: a fondness for small animals. Infatuation is foolish or extravagant attraction, often of short duration: lovers blinded to their differences by their mutual infatuation.

Definitions courtesy of:
Dictionary

It has been said that love is nothing more then an incentive to get one to reproduce.

Chocolate contains the the same chemicals as love. Eating a vast quantity will produce the feeling.